Thursday, August 19, 2004
one of us
my birthday's in one week. i'll be 19. all i want is an ipod, but i can't decide between the 20 and the 40 gig. please, if you have any input, feel free to share it.
one last sunday here. do i go to singles ward and kiss azn boi, or do i go to my parent's ward and see everyone? or do i squeeze them both in? or do i completely forgo my parent's ward? that is the way i'm leaning at this point...i don't really care to see anyone there...but i'm thinking i will go to two sacrament meetings, which for you non-LDS people is the most important meeting out of our three hours in church every sunday.
i am so excited to go back to provo. it's a joke. this year is going to be fun i think, and i'm excited to start it up.
saw celeste last night for the first time...she just got back from europe and i surprised her at plearn and brought her flowers. her aunts are tyte.
weirdest of all--i saw my old friend alex last night for the first time since the week i got home. it was trippy. my heart stopped beating when i saw him, like i'd been hit in the side of the head with a board but remained conscious. it's crazy how people mean so much to you at one point and vice versa but a month later you don't even give a damn. i mean really...that was probably the last time i'll ever see him. walnut creek is no home to me and i don't plan on coming back unless i really need to make money next summer--otherwise i'm off to europe to be poor and love living.
i've felt really down lately. down on myself for how i look, and what i say, and how i act, just everything. my hair is kinda purple. i really like it. but other than that it's awful. everything's awful.
my mom is putting unnecessary pressure on me to pick a birthday cake/pie/dessert, since i never get cake, but she just won't leave me alone about it. and really, it's no big deal. i like fruit, i like pie, i don't eat chocolate cake cos i think it's kinda gross. simple guidelines. pick yourself!
my bridesmaid dress came and it's really pretty. i bought new shoes but i don't like them. i bought a skirt and right after i bought it it went on sale. so i'm taking it back tomorrow.
i hate being so damn indecisive. it's my biggest flaw.
xoxo lisa
provo, here we come.
one last sunday here. do i go to singles ward and kiss azn boi, or do i go to my parent's ward and see everyone? or do i squeeze them both in? or do i completely forgo my parent's ward? that is the way i'm leaning at this point...i don't really care to see anyone there...but i'm thinking i will go to two sacrament meetings, which for you non-LDS people is the most important meeting out of our three hours in church every sunday.
i am so excited to go back to provo. it's a joke. this year is going to be fun i think, and i'm excited to start it up.
saw celeste last night for the first time...she just got back from europe and i surprised her at plearn and brought her flowers. her aunts are tyte.
weirdest of all--i saw my old friend alex last night for the first time since the week i got home. it was trippy. my heart stopped beating when i saw him, like i'd been hit in the side of the head with a board but remained conscious. it's crazy how people mean so much to you at one point and vice versa but a month later you don't even give a damn. i mean really...that was probably the last time i'll ever see him. walnut creek is no home to me and i don't plan on coming back unless i really need to make money next summer--otherwise i'm off to europe to be poor and love living.
i've felt really down lately. down on myself for how i look, and what i say, and how i act, just everything. my hair is kinda purple. i really like it. but other than that it's awful. everything's awful.
my mom is putting unnecessary pressure on me to pick a birthday cake/pie/dessert, since i never get cake, but she just won't leave me alone about it. and really, it's no big deal. i like fruit, i like pie, i don't eat chocolate cake cos i think it's kinda gross. simple guidelines. pick yourself!
my bridesmaid dress came and it's really pretty. i bought new shoes but i don't like them. i bought a skirt and right after i bought it it went on sale. so i'm taking it back tomorrow.
i hate being so damn indecisive. it's my biggest flaw.
xoxo lisa
provo, here we come.
Sunday, August 08, 2004
Life In A Glass House
I leave for school really soon. Like two weeks from this Thursday or something like that. We haven't decided. But it's really crazy. This was a really fast four months for the most part, which is good.
Last night I went to Brandon's. Normally I don't like seeing all those kids like Tanya Maureen Stiv Marlon etc. but last night it was actually really fun. Sean Megley was there and he still didn't remember my name. Chris Mabry was there and he wondered if I remembered him from high school (I did) and he told me I looked really good. I'm not sure if I can count that as a compliment when it comes from him. Teddybear (stiv) was really drunk and kept trying to freak with me, so I just told him he's hot cos he is. Then Danielle kept looking at me funny for like an hour or two (for those of you who don't know, Danielle is Sloan's "first" as she put it), and then she went and called someone and came back and said, "you went out with sloan huh?" and i said "yup" and then she told me how big of an asshole he was to her and to me and that i shouldn't worry about him because he's an asshole to all his girlfriend's eventually and an even bigger one after. i agreed halfheartedly. everyone has their problems and his unfortunately come out in relationships. and frankly i can tell he hurt her way worse than he hurt me since she actually talked to me about it; i am grateful for the time i had with him because i really learned what an ideal relationship is til all the bad stuff started going down...and also i am pretty much over it. it still hurts because i think it will hurt until i fall in love like that again, but in the meantime i'm having fun and meeting boys and making friends and filling up the hole with great things like catching frogs and taking walks and singing songs...not that that stuff fills the hole of a broken heart but it helps ease the mind a little bit (this was the longest run-on sentence ever)...
needless to say, i will be glad to get back to provo and leave all this junk behind me. it was really weird that she talked to me and it just made me start thinking about that stuff again and i've really been a good girl and not thought about it deeply for a long time. it's just a pity that he destroys so many girls like this. i hope he actually sits down sometime and thinks about the sadness and pain he's brought to people's lives. i mean, i'm lucky i'm a strong kid and can pull myself out, but others aren't so lucky.
but i'm done with this entry now i think. i've written a whole lot about nothing and i just don't like it.
<3<3<3>
lisa.
Last night I went to Brandon's. Normally I don't like seeing all those kids like Tanya Maureen Stiv Marlon etc. but last night it was actually really fun. Sean Megley was there and he still didn't remember my name. Chris Mabry was there and he wondered if I remembered him from high school (I did) and he told me I looked really good. I'm not sure if I can count that as a compliment when it comes from him. Teddybear (stiv) was really drunk and kept trying to freak with me, so I just told him he's hot cos he is. Then Danielle kept looking at me funny for like an hour or two (for those of you who don't know, Danielle is Sloan's "first" as she put it), and then she went and called someone and came back and said, "you went out with sloan huh?" and i said "yup" and then she told me how big of an asshole he was to her and to me and that i shouldn't worry about him because he's an asshole to all his girlfriend's eventually and an even bigger one after. i agreed halfheartedly. everyone has their problems and his unfortunately come out in relationships. and frankly i can tell he hurt her way worse than he hurt me since she actually talked to me about it; i am grateful for the time i had with him because i really learned what an ideal relationship is til all the bad stuff started going down...and also i am pretty much over it. it still hurts because i think it will hurt until i fall in love like that again, but in the meantime i'm having fun and meeting boys and making friends and filling up the hole with great things like catching frogs and taking walks and singing songs...not that that stuff fills the hole of a broken heart but it helps ease the mind a little bit (this was the longest run-on sentence ever)...
needless to say, i will be glad to get back to provo and leave all this junk behind me. it was really weird that she talked to me and it just made me start thinking about that stuff again and i've really been a good girl and not thought about it deeply for a long time. it's just a pity that he destroys so many girls like this. i hope he actually sits down sometime and thinks about the sadness and pain he's brought to people's lives. i mean, i'm lucky i'm a strong kid and can pull myself out, but others aren't so lucky.
but i'm done with this entry now i think. i've written a whole lot about nothing and i just don't like it.
<3<3<3>
lisa.
Sunday, August 01, 2004
The Moon
So.
Utah was a blast. I was really scurred to go just because I still hold some ill feelings with second semester, but my visit was great. I was only there for two days anyway... So the first day I just shopped all day--first in Park City and then Trolley Square and then Gateway. I got some great stuff at Anthropologie. That night Regan came up from AF and we played and it was really really fun. We always have fun.
Next day I went to Provo. Met up with Joe on campus and chilled for a bit, then to lunch with Scott, then to the Wilk to meet up with me mum so of course I saw Eddie because when is he not in the Wilk so we talked and I was hardly even nervous like normal and it was fun and he's still as dreamy as before...knew it. I have a random and embarrassing story about him and my little sister. But I don't wanna share it.
So it was a whirlwind trip but it was a blast and I'm glad I went and glad I had so much fun.
And I finally got a place to live...University Avenue Condos. Very nice place, Andrea and the girls living there, plus Chad my love. So it'll be grrrrrrrrrrr8.
Iono what else to say except I looked hottt at church today and AZN boi wasn't even there and Tom and Scott and their little friend Kristy went to the Lafayette Ward today and they didn't even tell me...Not that I care because I have more fun at the Singles Ward, but I guess I'm just sad that we're not really friends even though we're supposed to be??? I'm not sure. Perhaps I feel left out because they're hanging out with someone younger than me if ya can believe it, but most of all I think I really don't care...She has just said things to me about BYU Idaho and how it's a lame school, and although I really hold no allegiance to it, the things she's said are extremely rude and pretentious and immature, just things like, "I couldn't be friends with someone from BYU Idaho since I'm so much smarter than them since I got accepted into BYU and they didn't." THE NERVE! That's such a selfish and egotistical thing to say! Of course I'm also in the wrong for not defending it, but at least I didn't say that stuff in the first place.
I've almost completely stopped cussing. I'm glad. Glad glad glad.
This is the dumbest entry EVER.
I started painting again! I think I've already talked about this. But it's so therapeutic and it's great to have a brush in my hand again and I really like my work so far.
Plus, today is the most beautiful day ever. It's sunny and the breeze is blowing and it's just beauteeful. I love it.
And I love you ;)
Love, most sincerely,
Lisa Rue
Utah was a blast. I was really scurred to go just because I still hold some ill feelings with second semester, but my visit was great. I was only there for two days anyway... So the first day I just shopped all day--first in Park City and then Trolley Square and then Gateway. I got some great stuff at Anthropologie. That night Regan came up from AF and we played and it was really really fun. We always have fun.
Next day I went to Provo. Met up with Joe on campus and chilled for a bit, then to lunch with Scott, then to the Wilk to meet up with me mum so of course I saw Eddie because when is he not in the Wilk so we talked and I was hardly even nervous like normal and it was fun and he's still as dreamy as before...knew it. I have a random and embarrassing story about him and my little sister. But I don't wanna share it.
So it was a whirlwind trip but it was a blast and I'm glad I went and glad I had so much fun.
And I finally got a place to live...University Avenue Condos. Very nice place, Andrea and the girls living there, plus Chad my love. So it'll be grrrrrrrrrrr8.
Iono what else to say except I looked hottt at church today and AZN boi wasn't even there and Tom and Scott and their little friend Kristy went to the Lafayette Ward today and they didn't even tell me...Not that I care because I have more fun at the Singles Ward, but I guess I'm just sad that we're not really friends even though we're supposed to be??? I'm not sure. Perhaps I feel left out because they're hanging out with someone younger than me if ya can believe it, but most of all I think I really don't care...She has just said things to me about BYU Idaho and how it's a lame school, and although I really hold no allegiance to it, the things she's said are extremely rude and pretentious and immature, just things like, "I couldn't be friends with someone from BYU Idaho since I'm so much smarter than them since I got accepted into BYU and they didn't." THE NERVE! That's such a selfish and egotistical thing to say! Of course I'm also in the wrong for not defending it, but at least I didn't say that stuff in the first place.
I've almost completely stopped cussing. I'm glad. Glad glad glad.
This is the dumbest entry EVER.
I started painting again! I think I've already talked about this. But it's so therapeutic and it's great to have a brush in my hand again and I really like my work so far.
Plus, today is the most beautiful day ever. It's sunny and the breeze is blowing and it's just beauteeful. I love it.
And I love you ;)
Love, most sincerely,
Lisa Rue
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
