I love being alone.

I am sick of touching strangers. I touch them all the time, every day. On the subway. On the sidewalks. In the grocery store. In restaurants. Waiting in lines. Lines! When I first got to New York, I was overwhelmed with all the standing in lines I do. I would joke, "When people ask me what I did in New York, I'm going to say I waited in line!" I'm used to waiting in line now, but I still don't like touching strangers. Luckily I'm pretty good at maneuvering my body through tight spaces without touching anything, like the tweezers in Operation.

I've decided to make a big change in my life. It's going to affect some people. I'm not sure if they'll like the change, but I will. Sometimes you have to do things for yourself. I've learned a lot of things about myself this summer.

My dad has this phrase--his catchphrase, I guess you could call it, but he directs it toward me exclusively. A few months ago, I was struggling with certain things, and my dad said to me, "Fly with the eagles, Lisa." I didn't take this to heart. He bought me a ceramic bald eagle statue from Cabelas, and when he gave it to me, I laughed. It hurt his feelings. We fought about this. We always fight when he knows I'm struggling. Last night I was talking to my mom and I told her, "You know Mom, I've been flying with the eagles all summer, and I'm not going to stop." She called me a few hours later as I was falling asleep to tell me that Dad was proud of me. "Why?" I asked. "Because you told me you're flying with eagles. He asked if you really said that, that you were flying with eagles like he said, and I told him you'd really said you were 'flying with the eagles.' He was so happy you'd said that."

I have really amazing parents. One of my lifelong goals is to be as good of parents as they've been.

It's funny how our emotions change as we get older. When you're a kid, you really only feel happiness and sadness. I'm sad because my fish died. I'm happy because I'm eating a popsicle. Those are really the only realities. Once you hit puberty, you've added maybe 30. Awkwardness, self-consciousness. By the time you're an adult, you've added hundreds of emotions to those initial two. Confusion, betrayal, depression, elation, jubilation, annoyance. Life grows more complex, but we grow better equipped to handle it. At least that's the goal.

Tomorrow is my last day of work. I'm going to play Nintendo Wii and Guitar Hero all day.

I am nervous to go back to Provo. My life is no longer there.

I am happier than I've been in a very long time. Genuinely happy. Full of peace and joy. My life is on a very good path.